Which was nice.

My list of awesomest concerts ever just got one show longer. Which is good, because on the whole, my spring break has been pretty uneventful. But this concert was awesome. I'm referring to the Off The Beat spring show, for those who weren't aware, and they just really fucking rock. And of course, the incredibly talented Deb was up there doing her thing and making it look so easy. This girl is the same girl that I sat in the audience with at our first Off The Beat show. This is the same girl who I got to sing with in Chamber Singers during my sophomore year. I acted on stage with this girl, and I hung out with her (still do, when I can) at the Pringles. So to have been able to watch her grow from a member of our high school a cappella group to a full fledged college a cappella goddess makes me feel beyond honored. It makes me smile big and wide and goofy every time I see her step out from that red curtain at the Anthropology Museum. When she takes the mic for her solo, I am already on my feet applauding. And I will always be waiting for her after the show. To be able to be there each time she does another show is so special. This one's for you, Deb. You're an inspiration. You...well, you just make me feel so lucky to be your friend. I will always be at your show. =)

So spring break was totally uneventful, in a certain sense. I won't lie, I had big expectations. I had people I wanted to see so badly, but it didn't happen. It sucked. Big time. I did get to spend the day at Springside their last day before break, and so I was able to see most of my friends who are still there. And that was good, it really was. I was very happy to see them, and we had a great time.

Part of what threw me off is that we are supposed to be out of Wood Norton by the 30th of March. So I came home to boxes and whole lot of packing. The real kicker though is that we don't have a house to move into yet. The house we thought we were going to is still being lived in by it's occupants, and since we never signed a contract with them, we technically have nothing. So my mom is moving in with my great aunt until we find a place, and everything that was at my mom's apartment is going into storage. It's so surreal for me...I haven't been here. I don't know how to help or deal with it. And when I come back from school the next time, I won't go home to that apartment ever again. That was my home after my parents divorced...that's where I've spent the most years of my life. And I'm not even going to be here when we move out? I feel so disconnected...

I guess it didn't really help that all my friends had break at different times than I did. I didn't get to see anyone. I think I put myself in the position where I'm taken for granted. People expect me to be here...and I always am. But there's another piece of the puzzle too - believe it or not, I have my own desires. I want to see certain people when I'm home. I think people assume that I'll just be there the next time they need me, and so it doesn't really matter when I want to see them or not. I'll see them on their own time, on their own terms...

The problem is that I will always be there. I'll be taken for granted. And I won't say a damn thing.

Anyway, I miss everyone. I hope I get to see you soon.

But it was a fucking awesome concert. Deb, I love you. You rock my world.